At Home in Hespeler

When the rock world got together in 1992 to celebrate the life of Queen singer Freddy Mercury, Extreme were, in my humble opinion of the time, the highlight of the show. Not, I hasten to add, because I loved Extreme and wanted to see them, but because they blew everybody else off the stage. “That guy,” I said to people at the time, referring to singer Gary Cherone’s onstage attire, “will single handedly bring spats back into style.” Extreme were riding high at the time, two-years after their breakthrough album, Extreme II: Pornograffitti (A Funked Up Fairy Tale), and it wasn’t absurd to imagine Extreme breaking through to the next level, into the pantheon of huge rock acts.

Alas, it was not to be and by 1996 Extreme had split and singer Cherone was fronting an ill-advised version of Van Halen, having replaced Sammy Hagar in that particular piece of disfunction.

Twenty-five years after the release of Extreme II, Universal Music has given the album the remastering treatment, giving us a chance to re-examine the Funked Up Fairy Tale. On closer inspection, and the lens of time, it turns out Extreme II: Pornograffitti (A Funked Up Fairy Tale) is a better album than I remembered it.

I don’t remember, for example, it fading in with a little piano interlude over a rainfall backdrop, starting off with a hint of The Who’s Love Reign O’er Me before Decadence Dance kicks things seriously into gear at about 1:30. I don’t remember either the almost jazzy When I First Kissed You, Cherone crooning more than belting it out. As well Song for Love, both very melodic and slightly anthemic, didn’t immediately come to mind upon hearing it. The thing is, they’re not just forgotten songs, they’re all excellent, giving the album some different sounds, different flavours throughout. Even Cherone’s hippity-hop routine in When I’m President works well and sounds good.

Then there’s the stuff you do remember: “He turned me on to how funky rock ‘n’ roll can be,” guitarist and songwriter Nuno Buttencourt says of guitar legend Pat Travers. Travers adds a vocal to Get The Funk Out, an appropriate homage, as Get the Funk Out is one of the funkiest hard rock songs you’ll ever hear. Hole Hearted is a Bettencourt gem, my longtime favourite off this album and it holds up spectacularly.

Then there’s More Than Words. You’ll remember it, a lovely romantic ballad that was everywhere for a year or two. Turns out though, while it’s still lovely, it’s hardly romantic. A closer inspection and you realize, not simply a lovey dovey song:

Saying I Love You
Is not the words I want to hear from you
It’s not that I want you not to say,
but if you only knew
How easy it would be to show me how you feel

Shut Up and Show Me wouldn’t be an inappropriate title, although it might have sold a few less records. No, More Than Words isn’t a romantic ballad, it’s an extraordinary vocal song, once again different than the rest of the album, just in this case, the best song on the album. Possibly the best song of 1990.

As always with these remasters, there is a Deluxe Edition that features bonus material. In this case, it’s an extra disk, that features some interesting snippets. A couple of b-sides, a radio edit of More Than Words. But beyond that, some alternate mixes of More Than Words prove beyond a shadow of a doubt it’s a pretty vocal song that works very nicely regardless of accompaniment – even with nothing but a conga drum – and are worth a listen. And Get the Funk Out (What The Funk? Mix) is a straighter up rock version of the song that gives you a hint of what the song may have been, and shows how versatile Extreme’s rhythm section was.

I can honestly say, I’ve been enjoying both the original album and the bonus material these past few weeks. Extreme II: Pornograffitti (A Funked Up Fairy Tale) is well worth revisiting.

Disc One

1. Decadence Dance
2. Li’l Jack Horny
3. When I’m President
4. Get the Funk Out
5. More Than Words
6. Money (In God We Trust)
7. It (‘s A Monster)
8. Pornograffitti
9. When I First Kissed You
10. Suzi (Wants Her All Day What?)
11. He-Man Woman Hater
12. Song For Love
13. Hole Hearted

Disc Two

1. More Than Words (Remix)
2. Nice Place to Visit (Single B-Side)
3. More Than Words (Edit)
4. Decadence Dance (Edit)
5. Money (In God We Trust) (Edit)
6. More Than Words (Non Percussion Version)
7. Get the Funk Out (What The Funk? Mix)
8. More Than Words (A Cappella With Congas)
9. Get The Funk Out (12″ Remix)
10. Sex N’ Love (Single B-Side)

Record Release, Review A Funked Up Fairy Tale, Extreme, Freddy Mercury, Get the Funk Out, Hole Hearted, More Than Words, Pat Travers, Pornograffitti, Queen

By now, everyone has seen the picture. The dog is by the coffins, a ramrod straight Mountie standing to attention in front of them. My Facebook page lit up with this picture Tuesday afternoon, half-a-dozen Facebook friends posting it within’ minutes of each other. The combination police coffins and Police dog was too compelling for people not to respond, so they posted.

What did you see when you saw it? The Coffins? The Dog? Me, I saw the at attention Mountie in ceremonial uniform. But then, I’m getting used to seeing pictures of Rob.

That Mountie is my friend and former neighbour, Rob (no your not getting his last name). Every once in a while you get the morning paper and there he is. “You’re on the front page of the paper today,” I’ve texted him at 7:00 in the morning before. The Blue Jays opening night ceremonies once, saluting President Obama coming off the helicopter another time. One November 11th at the cenotaph I looked to my left and was standing beside him in full red serge.

My two favourite Rob stories involve my son. One day when the boy was about 10, Rob came over and knocked on the door on some neighborly business or another (likely borrowing a tool). He was just getting home and was in uniform.

“There’s a policeman at the door! There’s a policeman at the door!” my son came running into the room.

Answering the door I turned to him, “It’s Rob!”

“Oh,” he says, and walks away pleased that nobody in the house will be going to jail on this day.

The other time happened last summer, when the Mounted Police were in England as part of the Queen’s Silver Jubilee. A picture (above) hit the Facebook page of a mutual friend. Rob, about three feet from Her Majesty, engaged in a formal salute. It’s a close up, Rob’s from the shoulders up, the Queen’s head. We passed it around the table when it first appeared. “Who’s the old lady with Rob?” my son, now 16, asks.

Uncategorized Mounties, Queen

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The Freedom of Music, The Mighty Zep, This Week on my I-Pod Celebration Day, Chris Dreja, Jimmy Page, Led Zeppelin, O2 arena, Queen, Rolling Stones, The Who, Yardbirds

Occasionally I join in on the fun over at the Cambridge Citizen. Here’s my latest:

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During elections, parties struggle to get name candidates, people who have had previous success and can use their name to help the cause along. Based solely on their past, these star candidates often get responsibilities beyond what a rookie politico normally would. Liberal MP Ken Dryden and Conservative MP Julian Fantino are both examples of this phenomena.

Here in Cambridge, the Liberals have stepped up and nominated Queen guitarist – and, not unimportantly, Doctor of Astrophysics – Bryan May. This is a brilliant choice which, frankly, the Liberals don’t seem to be capitalizing on.

On the campaign trail Michael Ignatieff could come out to the faithful giving him the We Will Rock You clap, and Bryan May could step up and play the solo. That would pump up the crowd.

Ignatieff, instead of quoting Bob Dylan, should be sprinkling Queen quotes through his speeches:

Stephen Harper says he is for families.

I’m here to tell you, if he gets the majority he craves, he will tie your mother down, tie your mother down, lock your daddy outdoors.

That‘s not good for families.

Staying with the same song, instead of his tired speech about “that guy being in contempt of the house,” how good would Ignatieff sound if he said:

You’re such a dirty louse go get outa’ my house’.

When Prime Minister Harper attacked during the debate, Mr. Ignatieff could have sung back:

I don’t think I’ve ever heard a single little civil word from those guys… (waves his arm n the general direction of Stephen Harper)

Take that American Canadian idol.

Now, if I can improve Michael Ignatieff’s speeches and debate performance markedly, imagine what professional speech writers putting actual effort into the project could come up with.

After Bryan May wins the riding of Cambridge – and the Doctor of Astrophysics will undoubtedly beat the Chiropractor because he is, after all, a much better guitar player – think of the benefit to Canadian’s as a whole. In an effort to reach across the aisle and work with the other parties, Bryan May could play guitar when Stephen Harper gets the itch to gig.

This has the double benefit of improving the band – because Bryan May is one of the best half-dozen guitar players in the world, and he’s a waaaaay better singer than Stephen Harper – and improving relations between the two parties.

In fact, I think other parties should join the trend a create a truly great Commons House Band. The NDP for instance could get Police drummer Stuart Copeland to run in Regina. This would have the double advantage of giving the NDP a strong criminal justice spokesman. The Bloc could put up Who bassist Jean Entwistle in Mink DeVille, which is, I believe, part of the townships. The Green Party could confuse the hell out of everybody and nominate Mama Let Him Play singer and guitarist Gilles Doucette in Vancouver. With a band like that, The House would certainly be rockin’.

Excuse me, the phone is ringing…

Hello?… Yes… Uh-huh… not the same guy… Queen guitarist spells his name with an I… M-a-i?…

Oh, B-r-i-a-n… Yes, as my name is Brian with an i, I suppose I should have noticed that… Does this mean Bryce Springsteen won’t be running for mayor?

election '11 Brian May, Bryan May, Cambridge Citizen, Cambridge Ontario, Liberal Party, Queen

One likes to believe in the freedom of music.

Rush – Spirit of Radio.

A quick story:

In late 1974, Sparks were one of the biggest bands in Britain…. There was only one shadow on the duo’s horizon. They had just dismissed their lead guitarist. So they… began casting around for a suitable replacement. Somebody well known. Somebody respected, but somebody whose career was maybe on a distinct downward spiral. Somebody… like Brian May.

… His band, Queen, had shot their bolt…

“I did like the band,” May reflected. “I loved ‘This Town Ain’t Big Enough For Both of Us.’ Anyway, they came around, the two brothers, and said, ‘Look, it’s pretty obvious that Queen are washed up; we’d like to offer you a position in our band, if you want.’ I said, ‘Well, I don’t think we’re quite dead yet.”*

You get that? The boys in Sparks thought Queen guitarist Brian May might want to lose his washed up band and join the one that was bound for greatness. Of course Sparks were in the year when they would record their two greatest albums, Queen was still a whole year away from theirs. But nowadays you can be forgiven if you ask of Sparks, who?

I am one of the worlds few people who would rather listen to Sparks 1974 album Propaganda than Queens defining work of a year later, Night At The Opera (featuring Bohemian Rhapsody). What is surprising is, I may not be the only one.

It was probably more than twenty years between having a discussion of any sort with somebody about Sparks. They would, and still do, occasionally churn out a new album, having gone through an euro-electro-pop phase in the early 80’s. In 2009 they released their 22nd album, The Seduction of Ingmar Bergen. Yet I have never known anybody to buy one, never saw a Sparks CD and never heard of anybody replacing their copies of Propaganda or Kimono My House on CD.

I had forgotten about Spark completely, actually, until about two years ago when I stumbled on an MP3 download of the aforementioned 1974 albums. I downloaded it, assuming they would be an embarrassing memory, rather like Loverboy. Instead, I found in Propaganda an album that I remember loving, and still think is an excellent album. In fact, if I was piecing together a list of my 100 best albums, Propaganda would be on it. The other album, Kimono My House, which actually came first, is almost as good.

I’ve been doing the rounds of record stores, record shows and that sort of thing a fair bit lately. Now that “vinyl is back,” there seems to be more opportunity than there has been in years to browse records. On top of used, there is a fair bit of new vinyl records out there, including a big whack that is being re-released all these years later as “160 gram vinyl.” To understand it, 160 gram vinyl is short for, “much better quality than we sold you back in the day when we could take you buying our product as a given.” They are, finally, providing really good quality vinyl albums, and they are doing so at a price point that would commonly be called, not cheap.

Of the albums that has been re-released, and is in stock in every store I’ve been in that sells new records, the most surprising has to be Kimono My House. And it’s not just there. It keeps turning up wherever I buy records. Last week I was at a record show and saw three copies of a record I have never seen at a record show before. Last week a Facebook friend posted a video of This Town Ain’t Big Enough For Both of Us. I was shocked that I knew somebody who remembered this band.

For the uninitiated, Sparks circa 1974 is hard to explain. Singer Russell Mael and his Charlie Chaplain/Hitler look-alike brother, keyboard player Ron, are the heart of the operation. Russell sang in an operatic falsetto over a solid rock and roll beat. When I say operatic, don’t think Bohemian Rhapsody, rather like Grace Bumbry singing Sausalito Summernight. Or, more aptly, Luciano Pavarotti imitating Grace Bumbry singing Sausalito Summernight. And yes, I know I just described a somewhat obscure band using a somewhat forgotten, if not obscure song. But Sparks are like that, in that they are unlike anything you have ever heard before.

Here’s a prediction: if you decide to check out Sparks after reading this you will either like them a lot, or dislike them… a lot. There really is no middle ground. If you can get past the operatic vocals, there is some great rock and roll being played. And once you get past the vocals, you will find you like the vocals, and soon, you will start to understand the vocals (hint: he doesn’t sing as fast as it sounds like he’s singing). Once you get to that point, well Kimono My House is available just about everywhere records are sold these days. You’ll want to be getting it before it disappears again.

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From I Hate New Music, page 50.
Thompson, Dave. I Hate New Music: the Classic Rock Manifesto. New York: Backbeat, 2008. 49-50. .

The Freedom of Music Bohemian Rhapsody, Brian May, Dave Thompson, Grace Bumbry, I Hate New Music, Kimono My House, Loverboy, Luciano Pavarotti, Night At The Opera, Propaganda, Queen, Ron Mael, Russell Mael, Sausalito Summernight, Sparks, The Seduction of Ingmar Bergen, This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both of Us

One likes to believe in the freedom of music.

Rush – Spirit of Radio.

Gibson Guitars had a list of the top 50 front men (and women) of all time on their webpage. Actually, they had two lists: one put together by Josh Todd of Buckcherry, Chad Kroeger of Nickelback and Ric Olsen of Berlin, plus staff at Gibson.com. The other list was chosen by readers. Here’s the top 10 of each list:

Gibson

1.Mick Jagger
2. Freddie Mercury
3. Robert Plant
4. Elvis
5. James Brown
6. Jimi Hendrix
7. Michael Jackson
8. Roger Daltrey
9. Prince
10. Jim Morrison

Readers

1. Freddie Mercury
2. Bruce Dickinson (Iron Maiden)
3. Marc Bolan
4. Bon Scott
5. Robert Plant
6. Brian Johnson
7. Mick Jagger
8. Bono
9. Robin Zander
10. Elvis

We can pick and natter about the list, and ultimately that’s what these lists are for. So lets:

Really? Freddie Mercury is pretty much the undisputed best? Really?? While the “experts” pick Jagger, the readers placed him well enough down the list to make Freddie indisputable. One suspects however that too many fans think of Mick circa 2005, or 1995, when he looked like a skeletal old man refusing to acknowledge his age. Longevity has it’s curses…

There is an argument to be made that Elvis wasn’t really a front man, he was the act. And if we are allowing guys like Elvis, why not Frank Sinatra? Could you make a list of front men, and not have Sinatra on the top 25, never mind the top 50? Hell, Neil Diamond is there. And not to pick on Elvis, the same questions apply to Jackie Wilson, Otis Redding, Garth Brooks and, too a lesser degree, Chuck Berry, Little Richard and Elton John &tc….

And what’s this about Stephen Tyler being at #11 on the Gibson list and #22 on the fan list, yet Rod Stewart is #22 on the Gibson and doesn’t make the fan list? People don’t seem to realize how much Tyler copped Stewart’s Faces act. Oh, I know, I know, he copped Jagger not Stewart. Except other than looking kinda, sorta like Jagger, there is little comparison. He dresses more like an early 70’s Keith than Mick, but his stage stuff is all Stewart. The scarves hanging off the microphone, the dragging the mike stand around the stage. All Rod, before Aerosmith came along. Granted, Tyler uses silk scarves and Stewart football scarves, but that’s details. The point is, if Stephen Tyler is to be so high on the list (and don’t get me wrong, he belongs up there), then Faces era Stewart belongs in that neighbourhood.

Quibbles and Bits,however, as the dog is always saying when we argue philosophy (these discussions usually involve vodka). If Gibson readers think Freddie Mercury over Bruce Dickinson, then I’ll not argue. He wouldn’t top my list – and you know there’ll be a list – but then again, Bruce Dickinson? Not on my list.

Dickinson and Robin Zander. When I said top front men, did Bruce Dickinson and Robin Zander come to mind? Iron Maiden and Cheap Trick’s front men? Is Zander even Cheap Trick’s guy, wouldn’t Rick Neilson really qualify as Cheapest Trick? But lets face reality. A couple of fan web sites put fans on notice there was a readers poll and a “lets get Robin to the top of the list,” button. Even accounting for that, however, Marc Bolan? Who’d a thunk it?

For those who don’t know, Marc Bolan was the leader of T. Rex, although that was by no means his only band. T. Rex had a significant American hit with Bang a Gong. Bolan was their singer and guitar player, had male model good looks (in fact he did some modelling), the requisite big curly hair, and played a Les Paul on stage. He is credited with inventing Glam Rock, what we here in America tended to call Glitter. Think Ziggy Stardust era David Bowie, and you have Glam (or think Cherrie Currie dressing up as David Bowie in “The Runaway’s” and you’re there).

T. Rex released nine albums from 1970-1977, a decent output, to put it mildly. In fact, Bolan’s discography is impressive. In September 1977, however, Bolan was killed in a car crash, a passenger in a purple mini, in London. He was two weeks shy of being 30.

The thing is, I have never, ever, had somebody mention how good Marc Bolan is to me. In all the years, and all the music conversations, never once has his name even come up. It’s not a name that would have ever occurred to me. And to be clear, I’m not poo-poohing the idea that Bolan is the third best front man ever: I have no idea if he is or not. I have zero frame of reference.

Or at least I had no frame of reference. What did we do before the internet? Before YouTube?

Marc Bolan fan: Marc Bolan is the greatest.
me: Is he now?
Marc Bolan fan: Don’t argue with me, I’m telling you
me: Never seen ‘im.
Marc Bolan fan: Well you should check out… um…er…

But with YouTube, there he is, in full purple colour (the 70’s were incredible for music, but they really were a crime against fashion). He is more charismatic than athletic, all good looks and pretty smile. The physical manifestations of the job he leaves for others, the heavy Les Paul keeps him pretty rooted in spot. But for that, he’s not bad. I see what they are talking about, although he’s not about to make my list.

My list: you knew it was coming… here it is, my list of the top ten (plus some)front men (and women).

1. Roger Daltrey – he moved constantly, he had all that blonde curly hair. He had the most powerful voice in rock, and didn’t have trouble singing on stage. He would twirl his microphone by the cord sending it twenty feet in the air and during Who Are You he ran on the spot through the whole song. In Won’t Get Fooled Again he offered up the greatest scream in rock and roll, that counts here.

2. Mick Jagger – Not tired old guy circa now Mick Jagger, but the young Mick Jagger that preened and pranced. Pre 1980’s Mick who exuded sexuality out of every pore. Once he put on the knee pads it was pretty much over, but I’ll even give him the knee pads tour of 1981. Mick pretty much invented the genre and virtually everybody else is an imitator to one degree or another. He deserves to be much higher than seven.

3. Robert Plant – The best band in the world, bar none (even the dog doesn’t argue that point with me). By a long, long shot. Heads and shoulders above the next. So how low can their front man be? Not below 3, that’s how low.

4. Bruce Springsteen – Even now he fronts an energy packed band, never stopping, never seeming to breathe for two, two-and-a-half, three hours. If you’ve never seen him, it’s exhausting. And yet, those in the know will tell you he’s nothing compared to what he was in 1978.

5. Janis Joplin – Rent the DVD Festival Express and skip to Cry Baby. Those chills running up and down your spine, that’s why Janis Joplin is not just the token woman on this list.

6. Russel Mael – Every one who makes one of these lists, every critic needs their obscure, arty band to prove their bona fides: Sparks are mine.

7. Stephen Tyler – He really is good, no matter who did what first.

8. Alice Cooper – He hung himself, onstage, with mascara running down his face. He wore a boa constrictor for a necklace. He danced with a corpse, and with skeletons in top hat and tails (with walking sticks, naturally). That stuff counts for something.

9. Rod Sewart – Of the Faces, not of Do You Think I’m Sexy. He tied scarves around his mike, duct taped the mic to the stand and taught Stephen Tyler how it’s done – the tutu is a but much though.

10. Freddie Mercury – I have no frame of reference having never seen Queen live or watched any Queen concert footage, but if he’s #2 for the Gibson experts and #1 for their readers, that’s good enough for me.

10a. Elton John – The electric boots, the mohair suits: OK that technically isn’t Elton John, but he has worn both. Also, he has dressed by like Luis XIV, worn oversized glasses with windshield wipers on them and played Crocodile Rock on stage opposite a crocodile. At the end of the day, this is supposed to be entertainment.

10b. Ian Hunter – The shades, the rock star hair and cockney accent. Ian Hunter was still doing Glam in 1980, and getting away with it. You couldn’t get away with Glam in 1980.

10c. J.Geils – More fun on stage than anybody you have ever seen, that has to count for something.

10d. David Lee Roth – He can jump microphone high, and do the splits. He wore yellow jumpsuits. He once said, “I’m not like this because I’m a rock star; I’m a rock star because I’m like this.” Some people are born to be front men, some have front men-ish-ness thrust upon them. Diamond Dave is of the former.

10e. Bob Seger – Since we’re allowing Bruce Springsteen…
The most fun you will ever have at a concert.

The Freedom of Music, The Mighty Zep, This Week on my I-Pod Aerosmith, Bruce Dickinson, Cerrie Currie, David Bowie, Elvis Presley, Faces, Frank SInatra, Freddie MErcury, James Brown, Kieth Richards, Marc Bolan, Mick Jagger, Neil Diamond, Queen, Robert Plant, Robin Zander, Rod Stewart, Rolling Stones, Stephen Tyler, The Runaways, The Who

You just can’t do a Queen cover and improve upon what Queen did… until now:

Uncategorized Animal, Bohemian Rhapsody, chickens, dr teeth, Fozzy Bear, Kermit, Miss Piggy, Muppets, Queen, Rizzo