James Bond Skyfall
May 21st, 2012
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Posts Tagged ‘Daniel Craig’
Saturday Fluffernutter: The Unfollowing @alecbaldwin Edition
April 7th, 2012
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All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities
It was awards weekend last weekend as The Canadian Music Awards, known as the Juno’s, the Country Music Awards and The Razzies all were handed out.
With William Shatner hosting, Michael Buble winning best album for a Christmas album, and then not being present to accept his award, The 2011 Juno’s are being called strange. One reason they are being called strange is that deadmau5 did not win best electronic dance album. Frankly, any award show that takes a man in a mouse head seriously is by definition strange. The fact the man with the mouse head was in Ottawa only makes things a little less strange.
Over in Las Vegas, meanwhile, the Academy of Country Music Awards were also handed out Sunday night. The big winners were husband and wife Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert. Mr Lambert won best male vocalist while Mrs. Shelton won best female vocalist and album of the year for her record, “Four The Record.”
But the Junos and the Academy of Country Music Awards are the small potatoes. The real news is The Golden Raspberries. The Razzies for the worst in movies for the past year were handed out on Saturday night and for the first time one movie cleared the table. Adam Sandler’s Jack & Jill had more nominations than categories and Sandler won worst actor and worst actress for his dual role as Jack Sadelstein and his sister Jill Sadelstein. As well, Al Pacino won worst supporting actor for his role as Al Pacino in Jack & Jill. The movie, which critics at review site Rotten Tomatoes disliked almost unanimously, received all ten Razzies handed out.
A Charlize Theron sex video sounds like the end of the line for Internet porn, any further videos having being made moot. Alas, it was not the case as the sex-video released this week was a parody sex video involving Theron as in a dominatrix role and two submissive men being cowered by her. It was, according to press reports, Theron proving she had comedy chops. I disagree, it was not all that funny. It was, however, proof that what the world needs is a real Charlize Theron sex video.
Speaking of hot Internet videos, Bond Girl in the upcoming 007 flick, Skyfall, Naomie Harris, has spent the last two months at the shooting range learning how to use , “machine guns, hand guns… Walter PPK’s,” in preparation for the role as Eve, a field agent who works with James Bond. She has a video diary highlighting her progress, available, no doubt, at the better internet sites.
The role of James Bond in Skyfall will once again be butchered by Daniel Craig.
In other James Bond Skyfall news, there is rumour that the English Olympic committee is planning on having a Skyfall promo as part of the opening ceremonies of the London Olympics this August. This is apparently an answer for those who complained the Jimmy Page and Leona Lewis on top of the bus schtick was too cheesy. Because a Daniel Craig/ James Bond trailer wouldn’t be cheesy.
Alec Baldwin is engaged. the former Mr. Kim Basinger (54), retweeted a message this week that said:
Congrats to my longtime friend Alec Baldwin and his wonderful bride to be Hilaria Thomas. Congrats on his engagement
Thomas’s, for the record, is a 28-year old yoga instructor.
The good spirits around the engagement lasted all of a day, after 2 New York Daily News reporters attended Thomas’ yoga class Monday, where they snapped a couple of pictures of the Hilaria Diamond, a square-cut Cartier engagement ring. Baldwin was peevish in tweets Tuesday:
New reporters from the Daily News crashed @hilariathomas yoga class today to take photos and post pictures. their names are … Simone Weichselbaum… And Enid Alvarez… shame on the no-talent trash from the Daily News for invading the privacy of 75 people in a yoga class to take a picture of someone.
While he has a point, I must say, shame on Baldwin for using multiple tweets to send one message. I’ve un-followed people for less.
Saturday Fluffernutter: The I Never Should Have Slept With Chachi Edition
February 11th, 2012
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All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities
Madonna hit the half-time stage at last weekends Super Bowl with a large cabaret style extravaganza. The once edgy singer promised NBC up and down there would be no violations of indecency rules. So what happens? Guest rapper MIA gives the camera the finger.
No big deal really, but Madonna is said to be none too pleased. To her credit (and I don’t give Madonna credit very often), Madonna’s a pro, and when she says she won’t violate the rules, that’s what will happen. Therefore, MIA is in Madonnas dog house for her unprofessionalism.
Or, as Madonna herself put it to an LA radio station
It’s one of those things, it’s such a teenager. in a way, kind of irrelevant kind of thing to do… what was the point?
It’s bad enough to give your child a bad, celebrity styled name like, say, Blue Ivy. It’s another to trademark that name, making sure to cash in on your offsprings grade school beatings. But that’s what Beyonce and Jay-Z are set to do on their weeks old newborn.
The couple are trade marking the child’s name, obstensably to protect the name being used by others. Of course, if the child itself has a career in the future, this won’t affect that, right?… right?
Here’s a question, just how low can worst ever-Bond Daniel Craig and current Bond producers sink the Bond Franchise?
Heineken Beer will produce a commercial featuring Craig as Bond and highlights from the next Bond movie, Skyfall. That’s right, the next Bond movie will premier as a beer commercial.
Maybe a double boycott is needed this fall.
Skyfall, the 23rd Movie in the James Bond franchise, is due for a November release.
After 8 seasons, producers of the hit TV series House, including star Hugh Lawrie, have announced this is the last season.
The show features a brilliant doctor who solves cases Sherlock Holmes style in a New Jersey hospital.
The show will meet it’s maker in April after 177 episodes. Perhaps it has Lupus.
Former Happy Days/Charles in Charge star Scott Baio is known as a former sex-addict. Turns out, he bedded just about anybody you would want to bed, including Brooke Shields, Melissa Gilbert, Denise Richards and Nicolette Sheridan. Now, the actor, 50, is writing a tell all book which will include details of his sexual trysts.
I’m still trying to get this straight: Heather Locklear and Pamela Anderson agree to have sex with you, that makes you a sex addict? Geez, sign us all up for therapy.
Saturday Fluffernutter: The Yes, it’s Spelled Téa Edition.
July 2nd, 2011
All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities
James Bond and the Tied Knot:
Daniel Craig and his gal pal Rachel Weisz got married last weekend in New York. The quiet ceremony was attended by one attendant each, and the couples two children from previous relationships.
No word on whether the least likeable Bond rolled the wedding car on route to the honeymoon.
Big winner of 2011, Charlie Sheen will start the fall TV season… dead.
His character on the hit “sitcom” Two and a Half Men, Charlie Harper, will be killed off in the season opener. According to TMZ.com, the show will begin with dark screen for “just a minute or two,” as characters Alan and Jake find out he is dead.
Winning…
Mr. Mariah Carey, Nick Cannon said this week that he and the boss are done having kids.
I (Cannon) do (want more children), Mariah doesn’t. She was like, “That’s it, I’m done! Two at once!
Translation, it turns out having kids was not all about Mariah, and it won’t happen again.
When Nasa sent a spacecraft into the far reaches of space full of artefacts from earth in order to communicate with any aliens who may intercept the craft, among the artefacts where Chuck Berry records. According to Father Guido Sarducci, the craft returned with a note inside: “Send more Chuck Berry.”
The city of St. Louis understands the sentiment, and this week voted to erect an 8-foot statue of the rock and roll legend. The statue will be built on a new public bikeway near Blueberry Hill, the club where Berry has played a regular gig over the past 15 years.
The statue has it’s detractors, notably 86-year old Elsie Glickbert, who notes that 84-year old Berry is a convicted felon. Berry was convicted in 1962 of “transporting a woman across state lines for immoral purposes.”
Hard to understand why, 15 years after Bill Clinton, people aren’t more concerned about those 60’s era “immoral purposes” convictions.
Time to shave, trim the unwanted hairlettes and suck in the gut: Téa Leoni is back on the market. Leoni and her husband of 14 years, Californication’s David Duchovny, have separated for the second time in three years.
The couple separated for a year in 2008 after Duchovny “underwent treatment for sex issues,” i.e. was found to be a serial philanderer. They reunited a year later
No word on what caused this years split, but one can’t help but wildly speculate that the words “pecker,” and “pants” where used during the decisive argument.
Free at last, free at last… Lindsay Lohan is free at last.
Lindsay Lohan, felonious actress, was released from home detention after serving 35 days in house arrest for stealing a $2,500 necklace.
Her monitoring equipment was removed Wednesday morning, freeing Lohan from her days spent painting. No word on what she did after being released, we just hope it had nothing to do with either her probationary restriction against drugs and alcohol or David Duchovny.
Saturday Fluffernutter: The You Know You Have a Problem When Britney Spears is Manlier than James Bond Edition
May 28th, 2011
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All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities
Oprah Winfrey signed off the air this week, finishing her long running TV show, which is arguably the most successful show ever.
Winfrey signed off with a quiet show, just her and her audience, reviewing best of clips through the years. The day before, she put on the “really big shoo,” featuring a multitude of celebrities paying homage to the Queen of daytime talk.
The big O is moving on to running her own TV network, which will feature… a show of her own.
Plus a la change
Jeffery Deaver released his new novel in London this week at St. Pancras Station with champagne, a red Bentley and royal marines rappelling from the roof.
The Book?
So nice to get some new Bond material that doesn’t involve that pouty, wimped out man child Daniel Craig.
Speaking of James Bond, Casino Royale director Martin Campbell has blasted it’s follow-up, Quantum of Solace, as “lousy”:
The truth was it was a lousy film. Casino Royale really set the table for them and I felt they blew it completely. I’m sure Sam (Mendes) will do a good job (directing the next Bond movie). I just hope to God they don’t mess it up..
Look, the truth is, they are both lousy films, and it has nothing to do with directing. God herself could descend from the heavens to direct the next Bond movie, and as long as she keeps Daniel Craig in the lead role, it will be inferior.
Oh, God, she’s back!
Britney Spears is a talentless hack who uses auto-tune on record and lip synchs live.
Somehow though, she just won’t go away. Last weekend at the Billboard Skank and Hoe Awards (hilariously called the Billboard Music Awards), Britney started the show performing with Rihanna. They synched Rihanna’s song S&M by pole dancing in leather bodices while handcuffed.
Pole dancing and handcuffs? Sure sounds like Britney.
Go away!
Amy Winehouse is back in the news, and back in rehab. The super soulful songstress with a voice like Marianne Faithfull and habits to match, checked herself into the Priory Clinic in the UK.
Reports suggest this time out the singer, who’s had a big hit in 2006 with a song called Rehab, is drinking too much.
Saturday Fluffernutter: The Circling the Bowl Edition
January 15th, 2011
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All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities
The James Bond franchise will continue, after it was announced the next instalment in the classic franchise will go forth, with a Nov 9, 2012 release date. Daniel Craig will return as the super spy for the third time. It will be directed by the former Mr. Kate Winslet,
Sam Mendes and Michael Sheen is being talked about for the villian, a reincarnated blofeld.
It looked for a while like the Bond franchise was finished, as Craig almost fulfilled prophesy and ruined the iconic brand with his petulant boy spy variation on the suave, sophisticated super spy. Fortunately, the franchise is stronger than one bad lead, and now that parent MGM is returning to financial health, the 23rd Bond movie looks like a go.
Now about that Bond girl…
If it seems to you radio ain’t what it used to be, evidence that you are right: Britney Spears new song “Hold it Against Me,” broke a new record for most radio plays in one day upon it’s release Monday. In other words, according to the morons who run the radio you listen too, Britney Spears Hole it Against Me is among the greatest songs.
Radio: just another medium who’s end can’t come soon enough.
Greatest song ever or not, the Bellamy Brothers are claiming it’s not the most original song. It is, claim the Bellamy’s, a little close to they’re 1979 hit, If I said You Had Beautiful Body.
While they songs may resemble each other lyrically, it need to be said that The Bellamy Brothers never induced the flush reflex quite the same way as the new Spears floater does.
David Nelson (1936-2011)
David Nelson was a University student when he convinced his mom and dad, Ozzy and Harriet Nelson, to let him join their successful TV show. His younger brother, Ricky, was already a teen star due to the show. He played a fictional version of himself in the show, as did the rest of his family.
David died this week of complication from Colon Cancer. He was the last surviving cast member from the long running Ozzy and Harriet Show.
David Nelson was 74. May he Rest in Peace
Saturday Fluffernutter: Bond, Brett, Bullock and Some Ash Holes.
April 24th, 2010
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All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities
The latest entry into the Bond fare, Cry Like a Baby starring Daniel Craig has been put on hold due to financial disaster at parent company MGM.
MGM studios is for sale, and with a $3.7B debt, unable to continue as is. This has caused EON Productions, which make the Bond movies, to halt “indefinitely” the making of the next Bond film, tentatively called Bond 23. The movie was scheduled for a 2011 or 2012 release.
Headline in a newspaper this week:
European Airlines hoping for ash hole to fly through.
I can’t be the only person who thought, “finally, a natural disaster in which Sean Penn will be useful.”
Newsflash: Sandra Bullock this week was spotted shopping, without her wedding ring
Her husband has been caught fooling around with what might be the skankiest skank in all of skank-ville, and it’s news she isn’t wearing her wedding ring? Not in prison for killing the stupid bastard, that’s news. The wedding thing ring is up there with McDonalds makes a hamburger.
While on the subject of Sandra Bullock, she has been asked to return her Razzy for worst actress, which she good naturedly accepted the Saturday before the Oscars. The Razzy she took home was a one-off highly valuable trophy. The winners get a replica to take home, instead of the original. Bullock accidentally left with the good one, and her people offered to return it immediately upon hearing the story that she had the wrong one.
Want to know why America loves Sandra Bullock, look at how she has handled the entire Razzy award episode.
Former Poison singer and current reality TV guy Brett Michaels was rushed to hospital Friday with a brain hemorrhage. Michaels is in critical condition after being rushed to the hospital with a headache. The doctors discovered bleeding at the base of the brain stem.
Michaels had an emergency appendectomy last week after complaining of stomach pains. Next week he is anticipated to have leg pains, resulting in hip replacement surgery.
Michaels is expected to make a full recovery.
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