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Saturday Fluffernutter: The “Honestly Honey, I never Slept With K.Stew” Edition

August 4th, 2012

All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities

fluffincolorOh, thank God! I was getting worried there.

Summit Entertainment wants to assure fans that the last installment of the Twilight movie series, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2, will open in November as planned.

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The future of the series was put into some (but not really much) doubt when lead actress Kristen Stewart had an affair with her Snow White and the Huntsman director, Rupert Sanders. Problem is Stewart was in a two year relationship with Twilight co-star Robert Pattinson, and Sanders is married. Pattinson has moved out of the couple’s plush LA love-nest, and speculation amongst Twilight Sagaists was the franchise was in trouble.

In Hollywood, however, money trumps love/hate every time, and everything will go as planned – excepting maybe a couple of kisses during the movies promotional period.

fluffincolorOne of the odder developments since l’affair de Twilight has been the way the dumber members of the entertainment press have taken to dubbing Robert Pattinson as R-Patz’. Seriously, this is what you got?

In the spirit of lazy typing and worse journalism, here’s some other suggestions for shortening Robert Pattinson’s name:

Bob
R-Son
Rintint’n
Bo.P’

Furthermore, here’s some possible future headlines using the above names (warning to news editors, consider them all under copyright):

“Little Bo.P’ has lost his She.”

“Another relationship goes down in flames for R-Son.”

fluffincolorCuba Gooding Jr. made actual news this week. The once upon a time star was bothered by patrons at the Old Absinthe House in New Orleans. Instead of being grateful that somebody, anybody recognized and remembered him, Gooding got offended and loud. When asked to leave by a female bartender, CuGo© allegedly pushed the bar maid.

Police became involved and issued a warrant for CuGo’s© arrest. The actor, however, went to the police station, had a nice chat with some officers, and the incident is reportedly closed.


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