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Catholics Riot Over Da Vinci Code Blasphemy

May 17th, 2006

The Da Vinci Code, a movie based on the novel of the same name, opened today at he Cannes Film Festival.

The opening was marred by riots in the streets of Cannes, Paris, Amsterdam, London and Barcelona as Catholics, angry at the portrayal of the Messiah, Jesus of Nazareth, as a having survived his crucifixion and moved to France to marry Mary Magdalene and procreate.
“It’s blasphemy, plain and simple,” said a rioting catholic.

Church leaders have called for the death of author Dan Brown, actor Tom Hanks and director Ron Howard for their role in this desecration of the Catholic faith. “There is no room to question such basic tenets of the faith such as whether Jesus died as the bible states, whether he died a virgin, and whether he had children.” said one Church elder. “Obviously those responsible must be put to death…”

… Oh wait, sorry. Wrong religion… wrong controversy.


  1. Robert McClelland
    May 17th, 2006 at 23:40 | #1

    Your sarcasm would only be relevant if there was something blasphemous about the DaVinci Code.

  2. Brian
    May 18th, 2006 at 06:35 | #2

    The basic tenets of their faith is being questioned, what’s not blasphemous?

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