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Spitzer? I damn near killed her!

March 13th, 2008

I was not planning on blogging about Elliot Spitzer unless I felt I could add something to it, but I wanted to point to Lorrie Goldstein’s column in today’s Sun Governor should’ve zipped it:

If you’re wondering what my wife is doing up here on this podium beside me looking miserable — again — it’s because that’s what f…ing idiots like me do whenever we’re caught being f…ing idiots.

We believe having our wives stand beside us while we do our half-baked mea culpas, will somehow send out a message to the public that what we did can’t be all that bad because, after all, our wives have forgiven us.

In any event, please allow me to continue.

I am deeply sorry … that I got caught.

I can’t tell you how sorry I am … that I got caught.

I am devastated … that I got caught.

I apologize … for getting caught.

But if you think I’d be up here apologizing if I hadn’t been caught — like, if, say, I’d had an attack of personal conscience and could no longer live with my shameless self-righteousness and hypocrisy — boy, do, I have some ocean front property in Wyoming I’d like to sell to you.

And speaking of Spitzer’s milfish wife, Silda Wall Spitzer, I agree with Rondi Adamson that Silda looks like Jennifer Aniston – it was my first thought when I saw the pictures of her yesterday. What is it with Jennifer Aniston types that us men seem to want to leave them behind while we go off with some skanky tramp?


One thing I would add. My original inclination looking over this story Monday was to say, you know your having a bad day when you read your name in the paper in the same paragraph as “federal wiretapping operation.” Your having a worse day when your wife reads in the paper your name in the same paragraph as “spent Valentines day with a prostitute.”

I wish I could say that Elliot Spitzer doesn’t deserve the kind of week he’s having but, by all accounts, he does. And if Silda Wall Spitzer is giving him that rough week, all the better.

Politicians acting badly, sex

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