Archive

Archive for March, 2008

Saturday Fluffernutter: No Bond in Peru; Mary-Anne goes to Pot;

March 15th, 2008
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The nutty stories from the fluffy world of celebrities.

Bond Update: The new Bond movie Quantum of Solace, has scratched plans to film near the Inca ruins at Machu Picchu due to bad weather. Filming was set to start early this month but was scrubbed due to “Climate conditions.”

Dawn Wells, Mary Anne to legions of Gilligan’s Island fans, was sentenced this week to five days of jail time and six months unsupervised probation for a Marijuana arrest last fall.

*Sob – sob* our little Mary Anne, all grown up and smoking the Mary Jane.

Uncategorized

Spitzer? I damn near killed her!

March 13th, 2008
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I was not planning on blogging about Elliot Spitzer unless I felt I could add something to it, but I wanted to point to Lorrie Goldstein’s column in today’s Sun Governor should’ve zipped it:

If you’re wondering what my wife is doing up here on this podium beside me looking miserable — again — it’s because that’s what f…ing idiots like me do whenever we’re caught being f…ing idiots.

We believe having our wives stand beside us while we do our half-baked mea culpas, will somehow send out a message to the public that what we did can’t be all that bad because, after all, our wives have forgiven us.

In any event, please allow me to continue.

I am deeply sorry … that I got caught.

I can’t tell you how sorry I am … that I got caught.

I am devastated … that I got caught.

I apologize … for getting caught.

But if you think I’d be up here apologizing if I hadn’t been caught — like, if, say, I’d had an attack of personal conscience and could no longer live with my shameless self-righteousness and hypocrisy — boy, do, I have some ocean front property in Wyoming I’d like to sell to you.

And speaking of Spitzer’s milfish wife, Silda Wall Spitzer, I agree with Rondi Adamson that Silda looks like Jennifer Aniston – it was my first thought when I saw the pictures of her yesterday. What is it with Jennifer Aniston types that us men seem to want to leave them behind while we go off with some skanky tramp?

**********

One thing I would add. My original inclination looking over this story Monday was to say, you know your having a bad day when you read your name in the paper in the same paragraph as “federal wiretapping operation.” Your having a worse day when your wife reads in the paper your name in the same paragraph as “spent Valentines day with a prostitute.”

I wish I could say that Elliot Spitzer doesn’t deserve the kind of week he’s having but, by all accounts, he does. And if Silda Wall Spitzer is giving him that rough week, all the better.

Politicians acting badly, sex

You Can Say That Again

March 12th, 2008
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Last week the Macadamia Nut wrote about problems with Microsoft Vista:

2008/03/09
Does not play well with others
Anybody out there having a little trouble with Microsoft Vista? Turns out… you’re not alone

Well, it’s nice to know I’m not alone anyway. On Monday night I was blogging away, doing a three part parody of Bill Clinton’s musings that “Hey, we’ll let Obama, who’s in first right now, gracefully accept second place…” Two posts got finished (here and here) and posted. Meanwhile I was running Microsoft update in the background, when CRASH.

A full year after buying it, my version of Vista decided it was an illegal version, and that I must register it. So, four or five calls to Microsoft help later, with a call centre that kept auto-hanging upon me and Indian guys who simply couldn’t help (the process was so buggy, in fact, it can only be explained by suggesting the call centre platform is running on Vista.), I fixed the problem myself. But post number three sat, and sat…

Until now:

Coyote to declare a Tie with Road Runner

After years of failing to capture the speedy road runner, Wile E. Coyote has declared a draw with the road runner. “Granted, I never caught him,” says Mr. Coyote, “but he never caught me either.”

When it was pointed out to him that the Road Runner never actually tried to catch him, the Coyote said, “hey, it’s good enough for Dion, the Clinton’s and the Maple Leafs!”

OK, I’ll stop now, I promise.

*********
Going to be in and out of town the next three or four days so blogging will be light to non-existent (unlike the usual heavy load I have been carrying lately).

Blog Administration, fun, Vista Sucks

Seperated at Birth

March 12th, 2008
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Hillary Clinton:

The Joker:

Funny, I’d have picked her as Mrs. Freeze myself.

*****

They say your in trouble when the press stops editing your quotes for clarity (removing ums and ahhs) and printing the unflattering pictures. The two papers I saw today used the above image of Hillary Clinton, instead of some better ones by the same photographer at the same event.

cheap shots I couldn't resist. US Politics

Stpehane Dion to Suggest Coalition Government

March 10th, 2008

Stephane Dion today opened the door to a coalition government, joining the Liberal party of Canada with the Conservative Party. The plan would see Dion’s Liberals stop threatening to topple the Harper government, and in return Prime Minister Dion would make Stephen Harper the Deputy-Assistant Vice-PM.

When it was suggested Harper may not agree to relinquish the PM role, Dion was unapologetic:

“If you got the assurances of ultimate unity, then it’s a great mistake for other people to try to shut this process down early,” it is assumed Dion said. “If you put those two things together, you’d have an almost unstoppable force. I believe when this is over, if we can unify the Parliament, then we will clearly win because there is so much energy behind what is happening.

“We’d be hard to beat,” Dion added.

When told of the comments, Harper said, with unusual diplomacy, “what an idiot,” to which Dion replied, “hey, it’s good enough for the Clinton’s and the Maple Leafs!”

Desperation Politics, Silly Politicians

Mats Sundin to New Jersey…

March 10th, 2008
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If we win, we’ll let you take a point.

Seen talking animately to the refs late in Saturdays game, it was assumed Mats Sundin was arguing a call. It turns out, he was negotiating on behalf of his team. With his team down by a goal and less than a minute to play, Sundin went to desperation:

“Let us take the two points, we’ll give New Jersey one point and everybody is happy. We will all go out tonight and we’ll be an ‘unstoppable force.’ Or better better yet, give us Marty Brodeur, we’ll let them take Andrew Raycroft, and we’ll ‘be hard to beat.'”

Later, Sundin was heard to say:

“When this is over, if we can unify the Toronto Maple Leafs and New Jersey Devils, then we will clearly win because there is so much energy behind what is happening.”

When it was pointed out to Sundin that his team was losing, so New Jersey wouldn’t likely agree, he shrugged and said, “hey, it’s good enough for the Clinton’s!”

Desperation Politics, Silly Politicians

Saturday Fluffernutter: Lindsay does Marilyn; Indy does Indy; The Curse of Roadhouse?

March 8th, 2008
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The nutty stories from the fluffy world of celebrities.

Lindsay Lohan has recreated a series of Marilyn Monroe pictures done in 1962, which have come to be known as “the last sitting”. In the pictures Lohan poses nude or virtually nude in a series of unprovocative pictures. Bearing in mind that Lohan is 21 and Marilyn was 36 at the time of her shoot, Marilyn looked better. It takes, really, a fair bit of hubris to decide “I can channel Marilyn Monroe. I can imitate the most enduring sex symbol of the 20th century.” Unfortunately, Lohan has more hubris than the rest of the requisite talents to “do” Marilyn Monroe.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is due in theatres in three months, on May 22. The first trailer has been released and can be seen at the official Indiana Jones site:

He protected the power of the divine.
He saved the cradle of civilization.
He triumphed over the armies of evil…

Best line –
Indy’s associate (could that be Marcus?): “This ain’t going to be easy.”
Indy: “Not as easy as it used to be.”

Roswell New Mexico, Niagara Falls and those cheesy Indiana Jones special effects, this one looks like it has a bit of everything.

It is being reported that Patrick Swayze is fighting Pancreatic Cancer. Camp Swayze is denying reports that he is terminally ill, has lost 20 pounds and the cancer spread over the course of his chemotherapy. Unfortunately, far too often when rumours like this appear, the reports are accurate, the denial just that. Lets hope that Patrick Swayze truly is OK and progressing as well as his people say he is.

I am trying to decide whether Patrick Swayze’s cancer reports, coming the same week as his Roadhouse co-star Jeff Healey succumbed to cancer, is ironic or just a sick twisted coincidence. Either way it’s a sad testament to how pervasive this disease is. If not for Swayze saving the visual and Healey saving the audio, Roadhouse may have turned into one of the worst movies ever. Either way it was saved by two very good performers, both of whom we got bad news this week. I paid my respects to Healey when the news of his death emerged Sunday night so I won’t repeat myself. But I will mention that hearing much of the Healey music this week, I was reminded in retrospect he was an amazing guitarist and musician who, if the Gods granted fame and fortune based on talent alone, would have been a huge star. Truly one of the best, and I would add, a very underrated singer.

Fluffernutter, RIP

kill the rodent… Kill the Rodent… KILL THE RODENT

March 7th, 2008

Wiartin (HP) – Villagers of this hamlet east of Owen Sound today formed in a mob and marched to the site of locally famous Wiarton Willy. Carrying torches, pitchforks and snow shovels and chanting “kill the rodent”, the villagers came to demand an explanation of the weather from the local weather prognosticator. Willy this past February 2nd predicted an early spring.

“Six weeks ago today we put a simple question to the damned rodent, six more weeks of winter or early spring,” said one of the protesters. “He said early spring. Well six weeks later, not only do we not have spring, but they are predicting 30cm of snow.”

“Maybe he’s not a groundhog at all”, one protester suggested. “Maybe he’s a gopher.”

“Or a prairie dog,” said another, before re-lighting his torch and picking up on the chant.

kill the rodent… Kill The Rodent… KILL THE RODENT

Prairie Dog

Eco-arson nothing new

March 4th, 2008
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It’s hard to figure how a story takes life. Some self described eco-terrorists burn down some houses, it seems like a story. But two years ago At Home in Hespeler was reporting a similar story by the same group:

Local radio station News 570 is reporting that “Several Arsons in Guelph in the past months may be the work of an eco-terrorist organization.” This fire is one of the arsons started suspected of being started by a cell of eco-terrorists ELF (Earth Liberation Front)…

By all accounts ELF is a loose knit grouping who, according to their own literature have no leaders, members or official spokesman. They are none the less, highly interesting to the FBI.

What’s more it is being reported that 3 other fires may be related to ELF… These arsons are a pattern that has Guelph police very concerned, and citizens of Guelph should also be concerned. To date ELF does not seem to be responsible for any deaths, but when you go around lighting buildings on fire, sooner or later it’s going to happen. Citizens of Guelph should also be concerned, both that it is happening in their community, and that it is receiving virtually no coverage or getting the attention of the community.

Later the story was reported by the Western Standard, once again to great yawning indifference. It appears that Guelph Ontario is not as important as Seattle Washington in the Canadian blogosphere.

Going... Going... Gone Nuts For The Environment, The Media Following My Lead.

The McCain Blogettes

March 4th, 2008
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If your looking for ways to follow the American campaign trail, the McCain Blogette website is a great one. Written by John McCain’s daughter Meghan and featuring pictures by Heather Brand and video footage by Shannon Bae, it covers life on the road in McCain’s bus, the Straight Talk Express (why is it that politicians are so good at doing lame?)

This is a fun, youthful look at a political campaign from the inside. And while it certainly qualifies as a campaign website, it’s fun and light enough that even people who are not supporters of McCain should be able to enjoy it.

And while your there, the Blogette Playlists are a good read through; I’m still listening to Noonday Underground’s Boy Like a Timebomb.

fun, Politics American Style

Happy 60th Birthday…

March 4th, 2008
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Yes bassist Chris Squire.

The Led Zeppelin concert in December began with a series of singers/performers from Atlantic Records playing a song, maybe two. To kick it off they enrolled Alan White (Drums/Yes), Simon Kirke (timpani/Bad Company), Kieth Emerson (keyboards/ELP) and Chris Squire performing Emerson Lake & Palmer’s Fanfare for the Common Man (Written by Aaron Copeland). It was unexpected, magical and the absolute highlight of an otherwise disappointing opening portion of the show.

For that magical moment, if not for Roundabout, happy 60th birthday Chris Squire.

Birthday Wishes, Rockin' and Rollin' and Never Forgettin'

Julian Fantino and the Politics of Policing

March 3rd, 2008

I’m beginning to grow very weary of OPP commissioner Julian Fantino. It’s not how he does his job so much, and some of the things he says. Take for instance yesterday. Caledonia protesters targeted the Fantino compound in Woodbridge. About 20 protesters marched around peacefully and made speeches.

It’s extremely debatable whether Fantino’s house, and subsequently neighbourhood, should have been targeted on this way. But what does Fantino have to say about the protesters:

Why people would think that their actions today — their very personal actions today — would deter me or the OPP from doing our job. That shows a certain amount of desperation.

Do ya think that people who have been under siege, who’s neighbourhoods, in fact their community has been ruined by an illegal occupation, in which Fantino’s police force will not enforce the law, are desperate? I would have thought they were pulling their hair out of their head crazy by now. The thing is Mr. Fantino, “that shows a certain amount of desperation,” may be a put down against apolitical opponent, but these aren’t political opponents. These are desperate citizens asking that their property be protected.

It is, in fact, the whole point of taking the protest to your street, because they are desperate, and nobody seems to be doing anything about it. Commissioner Fantino, stop treating citizens you are sworn to serve and protect like they are your political opponents, and start doing your job.

pimply minions of bureaucracy

Harper Goes on the Offensive

March 3rd, 2008

I have been pondering la affair Cadman all weekend, trying to get my head in the right place for commenting on it. My concern was that I was quite prepared to pooh-pooh this whole thing because my team are the bad guys. That’s not good enough thinking, and I tried to turn it around: if this was a Liberal scandal, how would I react?

My conclusion, there wasn’t enough there yet. Legally, there is no crime committed, only hearsay evidence. Ethically, again it’s one a few peoples word vs. the hearsay of what a dead man said (if Cadman was alive, we have a different story). My conclusion was going to be, until the other shoe drops, there’s not much here. However, I also felt there was more to come, and it could complete this story. The question was, who was going to look worse once the story played out?

Well, Stephen Harper dropped a shoe today, a big one, by threatening to sue Stephane Dion, Ralph Goodale and Michael Ignatieff:

The prime minister served notice Monday that he plans to sue the Liberals if they don’t apologize for comments they made concerning the Chuck Cadman affair.

Liberal Leader Stephane Dion, the Liberal Party of Canada and MPs Ralph Goodale and Michael Ignatieff were all served letters over statements published on the party’s website.
Those statements question Stephen Harper’s alleged involvement in financial “offers” made to Cadman to sway his vote in a crucial 2005 Commons showdown.
Harper’s lawyer, Richard Dearden, calls the statements “false and devastatingly defamatory.”
“These malicious and reckless defamatory statements impugn the reputation of Prime Minister Stephen Harper,” Dearden writes in a letter of notice.

Who knows what’s coming next, but one things for sure: Harper has decided he doesn’t want an election over this issue. Unless the Liberals have more proof to offer (and believe me, the folks at the “Warren Kinsella coffee house and war room” are looking), they won’t be inclined to bring down the government over this issue – at least not yet.

Politicians acting badly, whack-a-mole politics

Jeff Healey 1966- 2008

March 3rd, 2008
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I first saw Jeff Healey play on the New Music back in the early 80’s. John Roberts was J.D., and he did a story on a blind teenage phenom who played blues guitar with the guitar across his lap. He cited Jimi Hendrix as an influence and played in a very Hendrix style.

Five or six years later, in 1988, Jeff Healey was on the charts with the album See The Light. It included the hit songs Confidence Man, the title track and perhaps Healey’s biggest hit, a wonderful version of John Hiatt’s Angel Eyes. His second album two years later, Hell To Pay, featured a stunning version of George Harrison’s While My Guitar Gently Weeps. It takes a man among guitar players to tackle a classic Eric Clapton solo but Healey pulled it off.

Sadly, Jeff Healey has fought cancer all his life, losing his sight to Retinoblastoma, a rare form of cancer, at age one. Last January (2007) it was announced that Healey had had been diagnosed with lung cancer surgery the previous December, and had undergone surgery to remove the cancerous tissue.

Jeff Healey passed away last evening at St. Joseph’s Hospital Toronto. He was 41 years old and leaves a wife and two children, 13-year-old daughter Rachel and three-year-old son Derek. At Home in Hespeler offers condolences to the family of Jeff Healey, a great Canadian talent gone far too young.

from Singles Scene

Guitar Greats, RIP

Happy 40th Birthday…

March 2nd, 2008


He is way down my list of Bond’s, although with only one movie below his belt he could well improve. However, he did get his giblets whipped and laugh about it, and that chase scene at the begging of Casino Royale is a classic.

But none of that is necessary. Here at Home in Hespeler, if you played James Bond and you have a birthday with a 0 or 5 in it, we offer the doffed chapeau.

Happy 40th birthday Daniel Craig. May your Bond learn the value of humour in your 40th year.

Birthday Wishes, Bond James Bond, Craig Daniel Craig