Archive for the ‘Bad Movies’ Category

McGuinty’s Billions

September 4th, 2007
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Well labour day is past, summer unofficially over and election season begins here in Ontario. This is not just an election for Premier, between two very left Liberal types, John “Red” Tory and Dalton McGuinty, but also a referendum on proportional representation (PR), or non-democratic democracy. I’m not a fan of PR, but will wait until later in the election to detail my objections.

It is, frankly, a hard election to get very excited over as John Tory is the very definition of a Red Tory (Red by ideology, Tory by name), and Dalton is a classic Liberal (lie like a b@@tard). For a conservative voter, this dog don’t hunt. Economists like to model a scenario they call the prisoner’s dilemma, this election is looking like the taxpayers dilemma.

Which leads to the question, where does a blogger go to get Hemlock? and how do you self-administer a dose?

I wish Monty Brewster was here.

Bad Movies, Ontario Election, PR.

Saturday Fluffernutter: Penal Paris; Name that Buffet; Michael Moore Eats the Treasury Department

May 12th, 2007
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Paris Hilton has finally spoken about, thereby relieving us of the excruciating pain of not knowing what Mme. Hilton is thinking in this difficult time in our lives her life:

I told the truth, I feel that I was treated unfairly and that the sentence is both cruel and unwarranted. I don’t deserve this.”

To be clear, what she apparently told the truth about was that “her publicist had told her she was permitted to drive for work-related reasons after the first 30 days of her license suspension late last November, and she relied on that.”

The publicist has been fired.

There’s a book out there called Invest Like Warren Buffett, Live Like Jimmy Buffett. This week, Jimmy Buffet introduced Warren Buffet at the Berkshire Hathaway’s annual shareholder meeting Saturday.

“Since blood is thicker than water, I’m your new chairman,” the singer, who is boycotting Canadian Seafood at his restaurants to protest the seal hunt, said.

Warner Brothers, feeling peevish about their movies hitting the internet before they hit the big screen, have cancelled preview screenings in Canada (not including media screenings). While stories focus on movies such as Oceans 13 and Harry Potter and the Order of The Phoenix, here’s some other movies we, thankfully, won’t be getting a preview screening of:

Nancy Drew
License to Wed
No Reservations
The Invasion
The Brave One
August Rush

Sadly Thomas Kinkade’s The Christmas Cottage, is not a Warner Brother’s movie, and thus will be previewed in Canada and will hit the internet, thereby causing plague, pestilence and ruining Christmas for everybody.

Paris Hilton’s publicist has been re-hired. Apparently he explained to her that being sentenced to a penal institution means spending a month at Ron Jeremy’s estate.

News that Michael Moore was under investigation by the Treasury Department, which sounds very serious, brought great joy to my heart. Then I discovered it’s for breaking the Cuban trade embargo and suddenly it’s the Treasury Department that looks bloated and stupid.

Rapper Akon is in hot water for a “dirty dance” he performed in concert in Trinidad on April 12th. The dance was recorded and posted on YouTube. The girl, it turns out, is only 14. Some call it dirty dancing, but what I saw was dry-humping, and I wouldn’t pay to see a singer do that to a woman of any age. I would post the video, except it is quite possibly child porn.

Some days I wake up, kneel beside my bed and THANK GOD I WASN’T BORN A RAP FAN!

Bad Movies, Celebrities, Fluffernutter, Paris, Thank God I Wasn't Born a Rap Fan