At Home in Hespeler

All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities

Last week at this time I mused on the subject of Lindsay Lohan, and what would I fill this space with if she stays out of trouble? I put the post to bed Friday night, put myself to bed, and by the time I woke up, Paris Hilton had answered my call:

LOS ANGELES - Socialite, celebrity TV and website favorite Paris Hilton has been released by Las Vegas police after her arrest for possessing cocaine Friday night…

For the record, Paris claims

a) it wasn’t her purse
b) yes the prescription medications were hers
c) it wasn’t her cocaine and
d) she thought the cocaine was gum.

No official word on what the hell kind of gum Paris Hilton chews, but for the record Paris: nose candy is a slang term.

Authorities believed her story so much they took all the way until Tuesday to charge her with fellony possession of a controlled substance.

Axl Rose is a notoriously unreliable guy. Guns ‘N’ Roses shows are often so late, not only is the start time listed on tickets considered a suggestion, but so is the date. If you’re going to see G’N’R be prepared, be very prepared, to sit around waiting for Axl to show, and a couple of hours from support act to headliner is not unusual. It is lame and unprofessional, but it also is what it is.

Last Friday, Guns ’N’ Roses took to the stage an hour late at Britain’s famous Reading Festival. Organizers had been given strict orders from the Police that the festival was to go acoustic at 11:30. So that’s what they did, cutting the power on G’N’R during Paradise City. Ever the hint taker, Axl attempted to continue using a bullhorn, but as the guy with the McDonalds bag on his head was strumming a solid body guitar without power, he quickly lost the groove of the song, and gave up.

Reading Organizer Melvin Benn had earlier in the week assured festival goers that Guns ‘N’ Roses would perform on time, as he was under immense pressure to make sure it was so.

It was, of course, not so. Sorry Melvin.

Dad’s an electrician (retired). Industrial, mostly, but he has done some contract work through the years. And his basement is a mess. Wall to ceiling stuff, mostly what us kids accumulated through the years that they never had the heart to throw out. One day it’s going to need cleaning out, and who knows what we’ll find? Some things, however, I pretty much don’t expect to stumble across.

When renovating John Lennon’s Tittenhurst Park home, near Ascot, in 1972, a contractor kept the toilet with blue flowers painted around the bowl. “Put some flowers in it,” Lennon is reported to have told him. Whether he ever did or not is unreported.

What his son-in-law did, however, is a matter of public record. He sold it at auction last weekend for $15,500 (£9,500).

Makes a guy wonder what dear-old-dad has down there: Celine Dion’s bidet, perhaps?

GreatFreudianTweets Batman:

@saman12 unfortunately there are no words to describe how sorry I am.

Unfortunately, Lindsay Lohan’s ex was tweeting about her bulldog attacking and killing a Maltese in LA Monday, not granting a moment of self evaluation.

Uncategorized Axl Rose, Buckethead, Celine Dion, Guns 'n' roses, John Lennonm Tittenhurst PArk, Lindsay Lohan, Melvin Benn, Paris Hilton, Reading Festival, Sam Ronson

I’m trying to decide what bothers me more about this story: the monkey’s ass who reported the kids, the bylaw officers who didn’t tell him/her to go get stuffed, bylaw services manager Dan Scoones, who said:

the next thing we would know, we would have two hot dog carts at the dog park and we would have two ice cream carts at the dog park

or the fact that I posted an almost exact story, this time out of Oregan, last week.

The world is being run by lunatics without an iota of sense.

Uncategorized, pimply minions of bureaucracy

Canadians can smell the whiff of sulphur coming off this guy

Hugo Chavez Liberal leader Michael Ignatieff has set out on his summer barbeque tour

Uncategorized Hugo Chavez, Michael Ignatieff, Stephen Harper

All the fluffy news about those nutty celebrities

Lindsay Lohan’s holiday in France is over. As rough as it was, stranded in Cannes in the spring, all good things must come to an end. So it was the Lohan got her paperwork sorted out and landed in LAX into the arms of the law. Her bail hearing, which she missed while she was being shut out from Paris Hilton’s party, was promptly held and LiLo was ordered to wear an alcohol detecting bracelet. Lohan was quite pleased, until it was explained to her that this bracelet was not a divining rod for rum cocktails, but to allow the court to monitor her commitment to sobriety.

They are going to make an example of you now, Lindsay, and you deserve it (my emphasis)

So says former Lohan boyfriend Aaron Carter. Classy. Of note, when Carter and Lohan split in 1993, Carter was a top selling recording star. Today, he hasn’t had a CD in 8 years, he has been embroiled in a lawsuit with his recording company after reneging on his recording contract, and he’s reduced to appearing on, not winning, Dancing With the Stars. Remember, Carter considers himself a dancer first, musician second, and he didn’t win Dancing With the Stars. Apparently Lindsay Lohan isn’t the only person getting what they deserve. Michelle McGee, aka (cough)Bombshell McGee, is upset that her former lover Jesse James didn’t acknowledge her during his recent mia-culpa interview:

… at the very least, I was hoping for some sort of acknowledgement regarding the pain and embarrassment he caused myself…

Yea well, at the very least Sandra Bullock expected her husband to not screw around with some disgusting, egotistical skank-ho. But as philosopher-king Michael Jagger has noted, you can’t always get what you want. Gary Coleman (1968-2010) Gary Coleman was a child actor who small stature and comedic timing made him a sitcom natural. His role as Arnold Jackson on Different Strokes was a natural for him. He starred in the comedy for eight years. His catch line, watchou talkin’ about, was always good for a laugh, whether on the show or when we were at the bar and somebody was talking crap. After a lifetime of health problems, Coleman died this week after falling and hitting his head. Basically, he bruised his brain, and yesterday was taken off life support. He was 42 years old. Dennis Hopper (1936-2010) Dennis Hopper began his film career in the 1950’s, but it was as an unrepentant hippy of the latter 60’s that he made his mark. It was an image that would last his life. His acting career lists over 200 movie credits, including my favourite, 1990’s Flashback, where he plays and aging, unrepentant hippy. His personal life included five marriages, including the last one to Victoria Duffy, which he was trying to have terminated while he was terminally ill. Hopper suffered for the last year with prostate cancer, which has spread to his bones. Dennis Hopper died this morning at his Los Angeles home, age 74.

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We start with the obligatory “I’m no artist, but…”

I’m no artist, but when I went to school and was bored I would, as school kids will do, doodle. The doodle was always this hippy guy, beard, peace sign &tc. Sometimes, I gave him a guitar, although not often because, I’m a crappy drawer and guitars are hard.

That out of the way, here’s “Mo & The Mullahs,” my contribution to Everybody Draw Mohammed Day:

More on Everybody Draw Mohammed Day:

The Fiery Kitty

The official blog

SDA

The Facebook Page that got Facebook banned in Pakistan.

Everybody Draw Mohammed  in the passive aggresive.

My favourite webgirl Wonder Woman

Uncategorized Everybody Draw Mohammed Day

I apologize for the inconvenience, but due to excessive spam, I’ve had to temporarily turn off comments and trackbacks. It may be a few days before I can sit and figure out how to solve this problem. If you have a comment you would like posted e-mail it to me, and I will find a way to post it.

Thanks for everyone’s patience.

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go to Osgoode Hall:

The Supreme Court of Canada/La court suprême du Canada has dismissed an application for leave to appeal the convictions of reverend Michael Baldasaro and Reverend Wally Tucker of the Church of the Universe. The church’s founders were found guilty of selling “small quantities of pot to an undercover officer,” which they consider a sacrament.

That’s the newsy bit out of the way. The Church of the Universe is a bit of a legend in these parts. Officially considered a big pain in the ass wherever they go, the Reverend Brothers, Baldasarro 77 and Tucker 61 just finished five and three-month prison terms respectively, got chased out of Guelph and set up shop in an old foundry here in Cambridge back in the 90’s. Curtis Gloade at the K-W Record penned a piece in 1998 about Cambridge’s attempts to move the practitioners out of town.

I have met both men, having shared gym facilities with the pair during their Cambridge stay. I’m trying to fathom the vast amounts of money spent in police, court time, lawyers fees and various appeals in order to give a combined eight-month jail term to two harmless old men.

Conservatives will remember Reverend Michael as a leadership candidate in 1998 for the federal PC’s. Sadly, Joe Clark won instead and the party became a laughingstock.

For more background, read this 1999 piece from Cannabis Culture Magazine and remember, thousands and thousands of dollars were spent to send these two fools to prison for eight-months. Somethings not right.

Uncategorized Cannabis Culture, Church of the UNiverse, Joe CLark, marijuana, Michael Baldasaro, Progressive Conservatives, Supreme COurt, Wally Tucker

via shutterbugging

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One likes to believe in the freedom of music.

Rush - Spirit of Radio.

Yesterday was Independent Record Store Day. Did you miss it? Are you, at this moment, slapping your forehead because you forgot all about it? Not likely. More like your saying to yourself, “there’s an independent record store day?” Why, yes there is, it’s a promotional event by some players in the music industry, and is significant because a number of artists supported the idea, and got behind it.

Of course, if you go the right websites, are on the right mailing lists, you knew about it. And quite a few people go to those websites, subscribe to those mailing lists. At Other Music in New York City, they lined up around the block to get in. Easy for them, you might think. They still have record stores in New York. While it’s true New York has everything, including a street with two chess shops across the road from each other and a peanut butter restaurant, you didn’t have to be in Manhattan to enjoy Record Store Day. Chances were there was someplace within a short enough drive. Out here in Cambridge, I had four or five options nearby, more than ten if I was willing to put in an hours driving.

Why, on the other hand, would you want to attend Independent Record Store Day? Why stand in line on Saturday to shop at a store that was there Friday, and still will be, presumably, Monday. The reason is that, as I mentioned earlier, a number of artists got behind the idea. Real, artists, significant artists, with long histories in the music world, released new material specifically for this event. We aren’t talking a new Lady Gaga video here, although she may have done so. How about a new Rolling Stones single, only on vinyl? The song, Plundered My Soul, is a find from the vaults. A lost song from the Exile on Main St. sessions, Plundered My Soul is a great rocker. Proof that The Rolling Stones were once a great band, especially considering Plunder My Soul didn’t make the final cut.

Plunder My Soul singles, which sadly were gone by the time I got off my lazy ass and wandered over to Encore Records, are already selling on eBay in the $30 to $60 range . As an aside, the Kitchener Record claims there was also a line-up at Encore Records at opening time. They did have a number of the items specially released for Record Store Day. A number of vinyl albums, Jeff Beck’s new one, and John Hiatt’s newest for example. Myself, I picked up two 10” singles, a new, Bruce Springsteen and a Them Crooked Vultures picture disk.

The Springsteen features two previously released tracks, but tracks that have never been out in a physical format before. Both have gotten the iTunes treatment, but the limited edition 10” is just for Record Store Day. The A side, Wrecking Ball, was recorded and written specifically for his 2009 Giant’s Stadium concerts. Giant’s Stadium will go under the wrecking ball itself. The song itself, according to Pitchfork upon it’s iTunes release,  is:

dedicated to the big building, New Jersey, living, dying, turning 60, and trying to hold onto memories in the age of parking lots.

B side is a live version of Ghost of Tom Joad from 2008.

The real treat of my day, the real keeper, is the Them Crooked Vultures 10” picture disc. In case you haven’t been keeping track, Them Crooked Vultures is a new “super group,” with Led Zeppelin bassist John Paul Jones, Foo Fighters frontman, and ex-Nirvana drummer Dave Grohl back on the drums, and Queens of the Stone Age front man Josh Homme on guitar and vocals. They are loud, brash, ballsy and real, real good. Their imagery, various drawings of a humanoid with a vulture head, is always excellent. Displayed in a Crooked Vultures red see through envelope, the picture disc is an excellent piece. The disc contains an album cut Mind Eraser, No Chaser, and a new live song, Hwy 1 on side one, and an interview on side two.

Over all Independent Record Store Day seems to have been a success, both for the stores that took part, and for me personally. It is simply great to be buying a new song, on vinyl, by some favourite artists, at a favourite record store. What more could a music fan ask for?

The Freedom of Music, This Week on my I-Pod, Uncategorized Bruce Springsteen, Dave Grohl, Encore Records, Exile on Main St, Foo Fighters, Ghost of Tom Joad, Giant's Stadium, Hwy 1, Independent Record Store Day, Jeff Beck, John Hiatt, John Paul Jones, Josh Homme, Lady Gaga, Led Zeppelin, Mind Eraser No Chaser, New York City, Other Music, Plundered My Soul, Queens of a Stone Age, Record Store Day, Rolling Stones, Them Crooked Vultures, Wrecking Ball

If you were wondering where the impetus for changing the words to the National Anthem came from, wonder no more. It comes from - ahem - Conservative Senator Nancy Ruth, who has been pushing the Prime Minister for a gender neutral anthem. And like all good social activists, she doesn’t actually take no for an answer:

…it’s not politically expedient. But it will come up again because there are thousands and thousands of women out there who want it to come up again.

I would rather hear Singer Nancy Ruth(above) perform the anthem.

Oh, there’s thousands and thousands are there? In a country of 35 million people that’s a part of a whole percent, so yea, go ahead.

Who is this Senator Ruth anyway? (Doesn’t that sound like the name of a snack food - “Senator Ruth Brownies available now at Mac’s“?) The Senator for Ontario was elected to the position in 2005 -  haha, just kidding. The Senator twice stood for election as a Progressive Conservative to the Ontario Legislature, in 1990 and 2003 (note: the Conservative senator seems to have skipped the Mike Harris years). Thousands and thousands voted for somebody other than her and she lost both times. Undeterred by minor inconveniences like the will of the people, she got herself appointed Senator in 2005 by Liberal Prime Minister Paul Martin (recommended by Liberal Premier Dalton McGuinty, we presume).

In her spare time she founded the Women’s League Educational and Action Fund, and a women’s Studies Chair at Mount Saint Vincent University. It’s tempting to suggest the only way she has a conservative bone in her body is in the Belinda Stronach sense of the phrase, but as Canada’s first openly lesbian Senator, even that seems unlikely.

Lets be clear about the national anthem. It is your anthem. It is my anthem. As I began to suggest last week, it is not the politicians anthem to change. It is not for Stephen Harper to tell us the words, and it sure as hell is not for Senator Nancy Ruth. Sing it as you want to sing it, using whatever turn of phrase means something to you. If enough people do so, it will change organically, naturally. Not shoved down our throats by someone who thinks the words public servant are both descriptors of the unwashed masses. And, of course, as is often the case in feminist causes, the people pushing for change talk about equality, but really mean something different. Senator Ruth claims to want the words “in all thy sons command” changed to “thou doust in us command.” However, at this weeks Conservative caucus she pestered her colleagues to sing “in all thy daughters command.” With an ear for phrasing and melody like that, she should try a music lesson before critiquing any piece of music. The material point though, she doesn’t really want gender neutral, she wants the lyrics feminized.

This, ladies and gentleman, is the Senator who has your Conservative Prime Minister’s ear. Frankly, if this was the kind of person I wanted my PM taking advise from, I’d vote for Jack Layton.

Uncategorized Mike Harris, Nancy Ruth, Paul Martin, Stephen Harper

Hey Osama, that’s not global warming… 

That’s the Americans knocking on your cave door.

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Hey Osama, that’s not global warming…

And those aren’t virgins.

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Does anybody remember when this guy was going to kill us where we live? Now he’s going to short our dollar and tax our carbon.

 I guess it’s safe to say without being accused of hyperbole,  if you impose cap and trade the terrorists have won.

Uncategorized Global Warming, Osama Bin Laden

Memo to Ross Rebagliati

Something else happened (when Liberal leader Michael Ignatieff was giving a speech) at UBC. There was a protest, in the middle of the town hall. But Mr. Ignatieff didn’t lose his cool. He listened, addressed their concerns, and made no apologies. That’s how democracy is supposed to work. Can you imagine what Stephen Harper would have done?

Hey, star candidate/stoned guy. Do you really believe Stephen Harper has never been interrupted by a protest? Of course he has, hundreds of times. Now, cite the case where he handled it any differently than Michael Ignatieff.

Can you imagine what Ross Rebagliati would do if reality interrupted his fantasy life?

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… Stephen Harper plays the politics of spite and spin, cynicism and apathy

Star Liberal candidate Ross Rebagliati to the federal Liberal caucus (Jan, 19, 2010).

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Kevin Costner’s bio lists 45 acting credits. At his peak, he played Wyatt Earp, Jim Garrison (in JFK), Robin Hood and Whitney Houston’s bodyguard. At his best he was Ray Kinsella in Field of Dreams, “Tin Cup” McAvoy and Eliot Ness. At his worst, he was mocked mercilessly for the hugely expensive, and disastrous Waterworld.

But we wish Kevin Costner birthday wishes for none of that.

In 1988, Costner strapped on the catcher gear to play career minor league ball player “Crash” Davis in Bull Durham. Costner captured Davis flawlessly, the perfect foil for Tim Robbins “Nuke” LaLoosh and Susan Sarandon’s southern belle Annie Savoy. A catcher with a better brain than arm, Davis gave us such memorable quotes as

Strikeouts are boring! Besides that, they’re fascist. Throw some ground balls - it’s more democratic.

and

 I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman’s back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.

It is for his performance as Crash Davis that At Home in Hespeler wishes Kevin Costner a happy 55^th birthday.  Now, about that rumour that your planning to do anothe rbaseball movie.

Uncategorized Bull Durham, Crash Davis, Eliot Ness, Field of Dreams, JFK, Jim Garrison, Kevin Costner, McAvoy, Ray Kinsella, Robin Hood, Tin Cup, Waterworld, Whitney Houston, Wyatt Earp

If I recieved an email from info@email.liberal.ca that was politicizing the Haiti catastrophe, I would be all over the Liberals, so it seem fair to offer kudos to Michael Ignatieff’s Liberals for using their mailing list to send a message asking people to donate to Haiti relief. Equally, consider this At Home in Hespeler’s call to donate what you can.

Friend–

It’s time to stand with Haiti.

The scenes of devastation beamed from Port-au-Prince and elsewhere have shaken all of us. But they have also reminded us that our first instinct as Canadians is to ask “How can I help?”

Our ties with Haiti are strong. We have a Haitian community in Canada that has contributed so much to our national life, and Canadians across our country are connected to Haiti through friends and loved ones living and working there.

I know that you were just asked to donate on Monday. But this is not about politics.

In these exceptional circumstances, now is a time to come together as people. Now is a time to act.

That’s why I am asking you to please support the relief effort in Haiti by clicking on one of the links below. Yesterday, we asked the government to match funds given to charitable organizations for relief efforts and today the government announced that it would - which means that your giving power is now twice as strong.

Canadian Red Cross
Doctors Without Borders
Oxfam Canada
Oxfam Quebec
Centre for International studies and Cooperation (CECI)
CARE Canada
The Humanitarian Coalition

Let’s show that we care. Let’s help Haiti in this time of need.

Thank you,
Michael Ignatieff

Uncategorized Liberal Party, LPC, Michael Ignatieff